im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
