I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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