What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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