Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize