I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
