he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
