we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
And my parents said I crawled through the house
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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