My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
