Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
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