I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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