just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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