I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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