We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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