that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
