did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
