He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
