check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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