he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Randomize
