Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Randomize
