I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
