glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
