does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
