So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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