Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
