i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
