i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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