She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
