So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
