doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
