My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
