i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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