On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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