If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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