afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
