How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
