Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
