who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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