Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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