1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
