yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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