So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
