do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize