I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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