brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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