idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Hippo gnu deer
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
