In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
