we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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