Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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