I hate your face
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
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