I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
we should paint friendship bongs
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize