Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
What a dumb baby whore.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
